Sexual Freedom

How is sleeping around sexual freedom? I think some women just like throwing the term “ sexual freedom”  around when they express their desire to have random sex with strangers  because it sounds powerful, strong and maybe it helps them rationalize making a decision that is counter productive to the meaning of  sexual freedom. I wonder, do these women know what sexual freedom is? Do they really understand what it is to be sexually empowered? How is riding random dicks freeing? If you think sexual freedom has something to do with a male penis then you are sadly mistaken because sexual freedom has nothing to do with a male or his penis.

Sexual freedom is  having the option to choose what you do with your vagina. You can choose to have sex or to abstain from it.You understand what sex means to you, and how it ties in with your mind, and body. With sexual freedom you have the ability to express  your sexuality without relying on a man or the opinion of others. Sexual freedom is taking responsibility for your sexual and reproductive health. It allows you to live with the choices you have made about your sexuality shamelessly.

Sexual freedom is not feeling like your body is your prison as you are probed by a penis. In my younger years I  believed that sleeping around was sexually freeing, sex made me feel like I had super pussy powers.In my book I talk about using casual sex as a form of escapism, an escape for me that turned into a prison. I started feeling trapped during sex. Sex became a chore, it was a job, I needed to get drunk or high to enjoy it. Feeling pressured to have sex is not sexual freedom, neither is feeling obligated to have sex with a man. Sexual freedom is having the ability to say yes but also knowing yourself well enough to know, and have the strength to say no. Is doing sexual acts you are uncomfortable with sexual freedom? Is being ashamed to leave your house and run into all the people you had casual sex with freeing? Is enduring hours of painful sex freeing? Is being treated like an object freeing? Is not being allowed to express your emotions freeing?  Is worrying about STD’s and pregnancy freeing?  If that is freedom, then I’m telling you, I’ve lived it, I’ve had it, and I don’t want it.

I want  all women to understand what sexual freedom is and to experience it. Casual sex and sexual freedom have nothing to with each it’s like apples and oranges, they are not the same and doing one does not prove the other.


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