A Christian Girl and Casual Sex

I grew up in a Christian home. I went to church Sunday morning, Sunday evening, and on Wednesdays. My parents read the Bible with us kids every night. I read the Bible myself every now and then, and I always remembered to pray.

I prayed for all the men I had sex with, every single one. I even told them about Jesus, and the importance of being saved. I read the Bible to them over the phone, and I prayed with them. I asked them if they believed that Jesus Christ was the son of God and if they didn’t share my belief I would not have sex with them.I knew that sex outside of marriage was a sin, but that didn’t stop me. As a teenager I often wondered  besides sex being a sin what else is wrong with it?

I listened to some self-righteous christians give their opinion about girls that slept around. They made it seem like being promiscuous meant that you were a nasty, bad person. They didn’t know that a ” slut” was in their midst. It was as if sleeping around was a contagious disease that they were afraid to catch. To them, sex outside of marriage was the worse thing. I always wanted to secretly retort “There are worst things that a girl could do.”

Sleeping around did not make me a bad person. And sleeping around did not make me anymore more of a sinner than they were, sin is sin. Throughout my years of promiscuity, experimentation with prostitution, and amateur porn, I never stopped loving Jesus, I never stopped praying, and I did read my Bible on some occasions.

Some Christians might try and question the relationship I had with God, but that is only for my God to judge. Through it all He was  right there with me. He knew my heart. Patiently, He waited for me to find my way back to Him. Here I was, drowning in a cesspool, and He reached out His hand and He saved me. Nothing is too great for my God to do  and no one is too far gone for my God to save. 

Now, you may totally reject the idea of God’s love or the existence of a creator, but whatever issues that you are trying to work out, SEX IS NOT THE ANSWER.  A man’s penis is not the magical key that will unlock the answers to your daddy issues, or any other problem that you are having. 


7 thoughts on “A Christian Girl and Casual Sex”

  1. I am reminded of my old World Religions teacher (also a Lutheran minister), who once told the story of the young couple who were being married in a ceremony he led. During the portion of the vows, the bride looked to her groom and said, “Thank you for keeping me pure.” There is this importance behind purity, which is that we not only want to live in such a manner so as to honor our Lord, but to ensure that our companion leads such a life as well and sexuality serves the ideal of becoming one with the companion who has been bound with us in marriage. I believe that sin, for the circumcised in heart, is most often a matter of compulsion, which is being consumed by the moment itself. For what it is worth, if I understand the conclusion to the matter and you have been freed of this sin, praise the Lord. Thank you for sharing this.


    1. Thank you for your comment. I don’t believe in being pure for a man, remaining “pure” should come from the individuals desire to obey God. Purity should not be idolized. Purity describes the condition of one’s heart it has nothing to do with virgin or non virgin. Virgin or not when you get married either way you become one with your companion. But again thanks for the input 🙂

      1. There are a few points that I wanted to bring up: to start, one’s virginity does indicate purity, but it does not have to. Consulting the scripture, the first section that comes to mind is the section referring to the 144,000 (Rev 14), where their virginity was explicitly mentioned as being part of why they were chosen. Following this, John writes that they were blameless – not just for the fact that they were virgins, though. As for living purely, you are partly right. We are to first live to God (common scriptural theme) and it should not be an idol in and of itself, but that isn’t to say that it should be forced lower than it is so as to not idolize purity. Living a pure life should be within the context of living for the Lord and it does involve living pure so as to not be a source of temptation to your companion, if the Lord has blessed you in such a manner. If the passion and desires are too strong, according to scripture, the two should be free to wed one another (1Co 7:36-38).

        Ultimately, the heart of purity should be to live in such a manner that honors God. Whether or not one feels a responsibility to their companion as a secondary responsibility is not as important as the first priority.

      2. You can be a virgin and not be pure, that’s my point. And I want to study the verse in revelation more to make sure it is being taken in its right context. Personally, I do not like the word pure or the idea of the purity, I feel especially as a woman that it is often times misguided. Being pure does not make you any less of a sinner than anyone else. Thanks again 🙂

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